Kiss & Make Up
by RY16
Summary: Oikawa knew he should say no, knew he should push him away. It was wrong, it was. Oikawa nodded. It was wrong but it felt so right. Just how harmful could one kiss be?
1. ONE

Iwaizumi cupped Oikawa's cheeks in his hands and leaned in. "Iwa-chan, stop teasing me. You're a mean drunk," Oikawa said in a small voice. Iwaizumi's breath smelled of the alcohol he'd accidentally ingested. This was so not how he'd imagined their first kiss would be like. "Iwa-chan, I'm serious," he planted his palms in his friend's chest pushing him back. He wanted to kiss Iwaizumi, had wanted to for ages, he was tempted to lean in himself but… he didn't want Iwaizumi to kiss him drunk, it didn't feel right.

"Shut up, Shittykawa. I'm not drunk!" He blurted out.

Oikawa sighed and rolled his eyes. "Of course not, Iwa-chan. That was just some bad juice you drank." Honestly, Iwaizumi Hajime in this particular position was exactly what he wanted. He pushed him back again. "Iwa-chan, go to sleep!"

Somehow, by some sort of miracle, he'd convinced the cheerful drunk Iwaizumi to crash at his house for the night (he absolutely would murder him if he let his parents see him like that) and it was all going well. _Too_ well. Iwaizumi was being too well-behaved, too… compliant.

"You're such a meanie, Tooru. You know I'm serious too, you know. I really want to kiss you right now!"

"Iwa-chan, yo- you can't," he stuttered, swallowing dry as he stared at Iwaizumi's lips. "You don't want to kiss me," he said softly. "Not really," his gaze dropped.

"But I do! I really do!" Iwaizumi rubbed Oikawa's cheek with his thumb. He pressed down, Oikawa pushing him back.

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa's strength faltered and he squeezed his eyes shut.

Iwaizumi's lips only brushed his softly at first. "Tooru," he whispered. "Look at me, Tooru," he pleaded. The brunet looked at the drunk boy with half-lidded eyes. "I really, really want to kiss you right now," he said. Oikawa knew he should say no, knew he should push him away. It was wrong, it was.

Oikawa nodded. It was wrong but it felt so right. Just how much harm could one kiss cause?

He managed to catch Iwaizumi's smile just before he closed his eyes. Iwaizumi's lips were chapped and his mouth was hot and tasted funny. Iwaizumi's tongue ran over Oikawa's lips, parting them slowly and the brunet, wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi's waist, following his rhythm, wrapping his tongue around Iwaizumi's.

When they parted, Oikawa hesitantly opened his eyes and he found Iwaizumi frowning at him. "Tooru was it that bad?"

"What?"

"You're crying," Oikawa's eyes widened and he brought his fingers to his cheek. "Didn't you like it?"

"I did Iwa-chan, of course I did," he mumbled, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand. "There was something in my eye. Let's go to sleep now."

Iwaizumi nodded and rose to his feet, motioning to the small mattress on the floor. "Good night," he said. Sleep came almost immediately.

"Good night," Oikawa murmured back, closing his eyes and praying with all his might for sleep to come for him too. Though it never really did.

…

When his alarm clock rang, his arm reached outside the warmth of bed to turn it off, just like he did every single morning. He threw the covers off his body and dumped his shirt on the ground, heading for the bathroom, ignoring the goosebumps on his arms or the cold he felt as his bare feet touched the floor.

When he left, Iwaizumi was leaning on the doorframe of his bedroom with tousled hair and half-lidded eyes. "Hey," he groaned.

"Good morning, Iwa-chan," he said with a meek smile. "You look like crap."

"Thanks. What the hell happened last night?"

The smile faded from Oikawa's lips. "You don't remember," he said, his voice flat. His mouth twitched as he tried to form a smile or a smirk or something. He swallowed, pushing down the lump forming in his throat. "Well, you were pretty drunk," he managed to say more like himself.

Iwaizumi's eyes widened. "Crap," he muttered to himself, closing his eyes briefly as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"I figured you wouldn't want to go home like that," he said, dropping his gaze as he walked past Iwaizumi to his closet. "So I brought you home with me."

"Yeah…. thanks," he murmured.

"So…. What do you remember?"

Iwaizumi hesitated. "Well, not much. I remember going to my cousin's house and poker and you laughing your ass off with my cousin's friends and you were kind of hitting on his girlfriend too," he laughed dryly. "Not much more though. Just blurs."

"I see," he said and began to put on his school uniform as if nothing had happened, because in Iwaizumi's mind it really hadn't. So what was the point of standing around and doing nothing? It was just an ordinary day. _Nothing had changed_.

…

That warm feeling of Iwaizumi's hands on his cheeks and the taste of his mouth lingered, kept him awake along with the dread of morning that crept closer with each minute.

His thoughts were plagued by countless scenarios of what it would be like once Iwaizumi woke and saw him. Would he regret it? Would he be disgusted, or had he liked it? Could… Could it be possible that he wanted to repeat it?

A lump formed in his throat when he remembered the image of Iwaizumi finally looking at him… with indifference. Still half-asleep, hair sticking out everywhere, clothes wrinkled from sleep… Oikawa sometimes, on certain nights when he was feeling exceptionally down, he let himself imagine waking up next to Iwaizumi. He imagined he'd probably look like that. But in Oikawa's fantasies Iwaizumi smiled and said something other than _laughing your ass off with my cousin's friends_ just after he woke up. Oikawa smiled grimly to himself. It's funny. Quite funny, really. Hilarious, even. Iwaizumi remembered how much Oikawa annoyed him but not how he begged to kiss him, to feel his tongue around Oikawa's.

"Oikawa-kun!" He snapped awake, his eyes widening and darting back and forth. "Oikawa-kun, you are a third year now and I expected you to pay attention in class. You have to think about your grades, you have to think about college!"

"Can I go to the infirmary? I'm not feeling very well," his voice didn't sound like his, the ever cheerful Oikawa Tooru, always ready to be helpful and smile, who always knows what to say.

The teacher pressed his lips into a thin line, shooting him a disapproving look. "Yes, alright," he eventually said. Was that supposed to make him feel bad, he wondered.

Oikawa left without a noise with downcast eyes and just as he stepped out of the classroom, he heard a chair being dragged back and an all too familiar voice. "I'll go with him," Iwaizumi said.

Oikawa couldn't catch the teacher's response but he didn't wait for it. He quickened his pace and as he turned for the stairs he raced down, jumping over the last two steps. Instead of turning right for the infirmary, he turned left and headed for the staircase that led to the floor below.

A hand grabbed his wrist before he even descended the first step. The warmth against his skin felt wonderful, like he was outside in a blizzard and the sun came out. "Oikawa, wait!" He didn't turn around to face Iwaizumi's eyes, he couldn't. He could hear the worry in his voice and picture the wrinkle between his brows. "Oikawa?"

"I'm fine, Iwa-chan. I just need to get a little fresh air," he mumbled. "I'm fine, so you can get back to class."

"Are you sure? I can stay with you if you want," he suggested. _Stay_ , he wanted to say. _Kiss me again._

"Go. I'm fine."

* * *

 **To be completely honest I'm still not sure how the next chapter is going to be like so feel free to send in suggestions. Or don't say anything and be one fo those assholes.**


	2. TWO

Sweat dropped from his brow to the floor as he kneeled down to tie his shoelaces. He glanced over at Kindaichi, laying on the floor, his arms shielding his eyes from the bright lights and his legs sprawled open. His chest heaved up and down quite quickly and Oikawa could hear his loud gasping for air. "You're not tired after just that, are you?"

Kindaichi propped himself on his elbows, giving Oikawa a frown. "Oikawa-san," He panted as he pushed himself to a sitting position, crossing his legs. "You'll hurt yourself if you keep going like this!" They'd been at it for about two hours. Kindaichi practicing his receives and Oikawa his serves.

"Yutaro-kun is so sweet, worrying about me like that," his lips curled into one of his smiles. He leaped to his feet and motioned to Kindaichi's side, crouching down at his side.

Kindaichi's already flushed cheeks turned a slightly darker shade of red. "Oikawa-san, I'm serious," he said and dropped his gaze. "Plus, I think you're going to tear my arms off," he added with a murmur.

Oikawa's fake smile faded, pressing his lips into a thin line. "I'm sorry," he muttered and he grabbed first year's arms. He started by running his index finger and his middle finger in the middle of his arm, applying some pressure. The first year flinched but didn't pull his arm back, simply watching the setter's movements with a certain awe.

When Oikawa was done, Kindaichi pulled his arms to his chest and stretched them out, the previous throbbing pain gone, just a mild ache remaining. "How… How did you do that," his voice came out as a whisper as he stared at his arms in disbelief, as if searching for something different in them.

Oikawa leaned in, whispering in Kindaichi's ear. "The human body has a quite few secrets, would you like me to teach you?" Kindaichi's jaw dropped. His lips trembled and he made small sounds as if he was trying to say something but couldn't quite word it properly.

"Oi- Oi- Oikawa-sa—

"Relax, Kindaichi!" Oikawa interrupted him, placing a hand on the first year's shoulder. "I was just kidding, no need to be so scared," Oikawa assured him with an amused smile. "No- no need to look so scared," he added, sitting down next to Kindaichi. He placed a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter, his body shaking slightly as he turned his head around to keep Kindaichi from seeing him laughing.

"Oikawa-san!" Kindaichi huffed, clearly not finding it as humorous as Oikawa. Oikawa glanced at him all red and stifled another laugh. "Oikawa-san!"

"I'm…I…I'm sorry," he finally managed to say, wiping tears from his eyes as he clutched at his stomach with his other hand. "Sorry, Kindaichi," he said with a sincere smile.

Kindaichi's frown softened and his lips curled a bit. "Well, I guess it's okay. Iwaizumi-san said you weren't feeling very well today so I'm glad you're laughing. Even if it is at me," he said and flashed him a grin.

"He said that?"

"Yeah, he was really worried too," Kindaichi said.

"Really?"

"Oikawa-san, I know this is none of my business but I just feel that you shouldn't be mad at Iwaizumi-san. I mean I don't know what he did but he said he didn't mean to hurt you and you guys have been friends for so long that I—

"Yutaro-kun," Oikawa said, the use of his first name silencing Kindaichi. "Thanks," he told him and smiled. He ran his hand through his hair, dropping his gaze for a second. Then he sighed and stood up.

"Oikawa-san, what Iwaizumi-san did to you… was it that bad?" Kindaichi was gazing up at him with a mix of curiosity and concern.

"Why do you ask?"

"You look… a bit sad today, that's all." Oikawa's eyebrows shot up and his lips parted slightly for a moment. Quickly, his usual demeanor returned and he gave him a short, fake smile and turned his back on the first year sitting on the floor.

…

He splashed water on his face, a towel hanging on top of his head, dangling sideways as his body moved. He rubbed his neck and arms clean too in swift, precise movements.

Oikawa took a step back, about to turn away – when all of a sudden the spiker straightened his back, drying himself with the towel and stared right at him. "Hey," he blurted out.

"Hey," Oikawa replied flatly.

There was a brief yet incredibly awkward silence.

"I was just telling Kindaichi that you serves are getting pretty scary, Iwa-chan," Oikawa smirked. "Though, they're still not quite good as mine," his smirk widened and he placed his hands on his hips.

"Yeah," Iwaizumi nodded absent-mindedly.

Oikawa's smirk faded and his arms fell slack at his sides. He averted his eyes from the spiker and ambled to the faucets to get some water himself. _No sudden moves_ , he told himself, _look composed_. _Tired even_ , he considered. It would be perfectly normal for him to look tired.

He passed Iwaizumi without the spiker doing any movement in particular. _Good_ , he thought, _it's going well_. Now, hopefully, Iwaizumi would either leave him alone or stay absorbed in his thoughts long enough for him to get out of there.

"Oikawa," he said with that tone of voice someone uses to say something important. Or perhaps that was just Iwaizumi's usual tone of voice.

"Hum?" Oikawa made the sound as he splashed himself with water, running his fingers through his hair. It was a perfectly normal 'hum' to say, nothing about it said Oikawa was thinking about getting the hell out of there.

"About last night I—

"What about it?" Oikawa said cheerfully with a tight-lipped smile. Nothing is wrong, what would be wrong? Why would they need to discuss last night? Oikawa thoroughly believed that if he sounded cheerful and naïve in his mind that he would sound that way in reality as well.

Iwaizumi was taken aback, seemingly lost on what he was going to say next. "I… did I… did I do something weird?"

Oikawa tilted his head to the side, his expression unchanged even though he felt his anger building up inside him. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know…" he dropped his eyes. "Did I… do something to you?"

Oikawa's lip trembled with anger but his smile remained there. "No, nothing," he said louder than he wished. He cleared his throat. "We should really get back to practice," the setter mentioned.

Oikawa started walking back to the gym but something pulled at his wrist. His head snapped back at Iwaizumi. "Wait," Iwaizumi asked with a frown.

"Iwa-chan, we shoul—

"I'm sorry," he said, tightening his grip around Oikawa's wrist. "I'm sorry about last night. I was drunk and I shouldn't have done it. It was wrong, I'm sorry."

Oikawa's anger faded a bit as he saw Iwaizumi's expression and the softness in his voice, the regret… "It's okay, Iwa-chan. You got drunk accidentally. Besides, you didn't do anyth—

"I'm sorry for kissing you," he blurted out.

Oikawa's pretty little façade dropped. "What," he saidwhsi barely audible. "You… you remember?" His expression was pure shock and disbelief.

Iwaizumi nodded, avoiding Oikawa's gaze. "I'm really sorry. It was a mistake, I see that now. I shouldn't have forced you like that."

"A mistake!?" He sputtered pulling his arm free from Iwaizumi's grip. He frowned, his lips curling into a sneer. "A mistake, huh? I was never good enough for you, was I?" His tears streamed down his cheeks unchecked. "You never even considered me, never considered my feelings for you but you begged! You _begged_ me!" He raised his chin slightly, staring down at Iwaizumi. " _You_ begged _me_ and now I AM A MISTAKE!?"

Iwaizumi reached for his hand. "Oikawa, I—

"Don't!" Oikawa slapped him away, shaking his head. "Don't touch me," and he walked away.

* * *

 **A/N:**

I'm pretty proud about how this ch turned out.

I'd like to thank **_BakaNH_ ** for giving me the idea that Iwaizumi actually remembered the kiss and also **_charmingchrissy1_ ** for Iwaizumi's feelings and the idea for multiple chapters because I was thinking about ending it with this one. Also because this probably would've ended up as another just fluff fic. Basically you guys gave me the idea to torment Oikawa a bit. Poor Oikawa though, I hate doing this to him. Also thank you to **Guest ** and **thelordofabsolutelynothing** , of course. It's always nice to get some feedback!

The next chapter is already planned and I hope I can write it as well as it deserves because I just like this idea so much. I wanna do right by it, yk?

Well, please do tell me if this chapter was any good or not. I tried to transmit Oikawa's feelings well in that last bit, I hope I did it well, at least...


	3. THREE

The sudden warmth on his arm brought him back to reality. He pushed the magazine away from his face, taking his earphones off. "What?" He uttered, propping himself up on his elbows.

"Oikawa-san, what the heck are you doing in the gym closet?" He recognized the voice immediately. The first year sat at the end of the mattress and Oikawa pushed himself into a sitting position and motioned to his side.

"Well as you can see, Kindaichi there's this lovely mattress over here and I thought I might as well take a nap," he admitted with a petit tight-lipped smile.

"You should go to class, you still have time," he advised, a small wrinkle forming between his brows. "This isn't like you, Oikawa-san. Skipping class….you're better than that."

Oikawa still felt that haziness from sleep so he couldn't quite read Kindaichi's expression but he felt he was more than concerned. There was a chance he was misunderstanding, but it seemed to Oikawa that Kindaichi was sad for some reason.

The curves of his lips dropped slightly, and his gaze dropped momentarily. "I'm just not feeling very well," he flashed him a quick grin. A quick grin and a lie, was one of the best descriptions for Oikawa Tooru, in fact.

"But…." Kindaichi paused. "You shouldn't let this fight with Iwaizumi-san get you down. It'll be okay, really. You two just need to talk," the first year boy murmured.

"It's not that simple," Oikawa said with a small voice. It was silent for a few seconds. Kindaichi kept glancing at him, not knowing what to say but wanting to say something almost desperately. Oikawa pulled one of his knees to his chest, resting the side of his head on top, looking directly at Kindaichi's eyes. "Who do you love, Kindaichi? Are they really worth loving?"

His first reaction was to blush, of course. First years were still basically middle school boys who knew nothing about love. "Yeah," he began, in spite of his nervousness and discomfort. "He's amazing; definitely the smartest person I know, great at everything… sports, school, people…. He has a really good heart though most people don't usually notice that at first and he doesn't always show what he's feeling and even though he acts like a spoiled brat sometimes he really comes through when you need him…."

He dropped his knee and leaned in, Kindaichi not even noticing Oikawa was so close before it was too late. "Oikawa-san?" He closed the distance between them and kissed Kindaichi softly.

"I'm sure Kunimi-chan likes you too, Kindaichi. You should tell him."

Kindaichi's eyes watered. "Kunimi? Oikawa-san, I'm in love with _you_." Oikawa's eyes widened a bit and he smiled sincerely happy, and he tried to kiss him again but Kindaichi shoved him away. "No, stop!" Kindaichi stood abruptly and backed away.

Oikawa's vision blurred and his hand flew to his mouth when he realized what he'd done. "I- I'm sorry, Kindaichi," he said. "I'm so sorry." He was just like Iwaizumi. To kiss the one who loved you most without feeling the same was a terrible thing. It could tear them apart, he thought.

Oikawa rose to his feet and instinctively Kindaichi took a step back, clutching at the rim of his jacket with his hands so tightly his knuckles turned white. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I wish…" he said in a small voice, swallowing dry, trying to dissolve the knot forming in his throat. "I wish I was in love with you…" a tear dropped from his eye and he muttered a quick "I'm sorry" before hurrying outside of the gym storage closet.

…

When he heard that first knock on the door a name instantly crossed him mind. He shook his head, trying to shake the thoughts and feelings that followed that name. Futile, of course, since the knocking continued.

Oikawa didn't understand why Iwaizumi wouldn't give up. He knew the other teen had been making excuses for him the past few days to the teacher and to the coach. If he was tired of doing so why didn't he simply stop?

Eventually, he rose from his seat and sauntered to his room to fetch his headphones and a game console. He'd never been very good at dealing with his problems.

Soon he dozed off – and he had the weirdest dream. Iwaizumi had broken into his house and was making him dinner, though he couldn't figure out what it was from the smell – he just knew it smelled delicious.

Except – Oikawa was blinking rapidly now to focus his blurry eyes. He supported himself on the armchair as he stood, his hand darting to grab the game console dropping from his lap. He missed it for only a centimeter and it landed on the floor, bouncing once with a clacking noise. His eyes shot up and he noticed the spike-haired teen in the kitchen turning around to meet his gaze.

"Hey," he greeted, averting his gaze to some task. From where he stood Oikawa could hear the sound of something frying, and the sound of Iwaizumi chopping something on a wooden board.

"What are you doing in my house?" Was the obvious question to ask, though there other things in Oikawa's mind.

"Your mom called me, she said your phone was off. She wanted me to tell she was going to be working late tonight and to go ahead and have dinner without her," he said without looking at him.

"So you broke in and decided to make dinner?"

"I know where your mom keeps the spare key."

Oikawa pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. His arm dropped slack at his side. He stalked to the island, sitting on a stool. "What are you making," he asked flatly, resting his chin atop his palm. He didn't have the energy to be angry, so he decided to ignore the screaming knot inside his stomach and the hollowness he felt.

"It's a surprise," he commented with a weird lightness to his voice. "You'll love it, I promise." He had that serious look that was common for him, but somehow seemed eager, excited even. Oikawa didn't get it. How could he act like nothing was wrong? Oikawa swallowed dry and blinked the tears away. Did he mean that little to Iwaizumi, that acting normally was this easy for him? _Just like the good old days_ , Oikawa thought bitterly, remembering all those nights they spent at his house having dinner together, playing video games together, and studying together when Iwaizumi didn't know about his feelings. He tried to push away those thoughts. He didn't want to cry.

"So… Apparently there's going to be a history test the day after tomorrow. Do you want to study together? I'm having a hard time memorizing— Oikawa, what's wrong?"

Oikawa rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. "It's nothing," he managed to say, his voice thick with emotion. He sniffled, turning in his seat so Iwaizumi wouldn't see his face. "I'm fine," he muttered.

"The hell you are," Iwaizumi cursed, and Oikawa heard his footsteps getting louder as he approached him. "Oikawa," Iwaizumi's hand touched his back and Oikawa fled from his touch, slipping off the wooden stool.

"I said I'm fine!" He shouted, taking deep breaths to try to calm himself. "I'm fine," he whispered, this time mostly to himself.

"I'm…." his voice trailed. Oikawa could feel an apology coming his way, but what was there to forgive? A drunken mistake? It wasn't Iwaizumi's fault he didn't love him back, Oikawa kept telling himself. But if it wasn't Iwaizumi's fault… then it was Oikawa's fault, right? "I didn't mean to hurt you," Iwaizumi admitted, taking a deep breath before he continued. "I'm sorry about that night," he said in a soft voice.

The sadness in his voice hurt the most. "Why?" He spat, his chest heaving up and down as he gasped for air, but no matter how much he tried the knot in his throat kept tightening. He clenched his fists at his sides trying to keep them from shaking. "I don't understand…" his voice betrayed him mid-sentence. Tears ran down his cheeks, his lips trembling as he pressed them into a thin line. He cleared his throat, loudly, hoping his voice wouldn't fail him and he shut his eyes. "Why did you kiss me?"

He felt warm hands cup his cheeks and he stepped back trying to pull away from Iwaizumi's grasp but the other teen was faster and pushed him against the island. "Look at me," he said. "Look at me, Tooru!" Oikawa reluctantly opened his eyes. Iwaizumi was looking straight at him, his own cheeks blushing and streaked with tear marks. "I kissed you because I love you."

"What," Oikawa's voice came out flat. "What," he repeated. "But I- you, you said it was a mistake," he sobbed. "You said I was— he sobbed again and his whole body shook.

"Tooru," he whispered, clearing his throat so he could speak louder. "I really wanted to- to kiss you bu- but you didn't want me to and the- then you we- were crying," he sniffled.

"I wanted to kiss you too," he blurted out.

"But you said—

"I wanted to kiss you sober," he admitted. "Not like _that._ "

Iwaizumi's eyes widened and they remained silent for a minute staring back at one another, neither of them sure of what to say. "Tooru," Iwaizumi took a step closer to him. "Ca- can I kiss you again?" A light shade of red crept up to Oikawa's cheeks as he smiled meekly and nodded.

"Iwa-chan, I love you too." Oikawa whispered just before their lips touched.

* * *

 **I'd really like some feedback on this one because it was pretty hard for me to write it. This is the third version and I'm actually kind of proud of it and I don't know if the ending's any good or not but I like it (I lit cried writing it). So it would be wonderful to hear your thoughts about this final chaper, whatever they might be!**

 **Thanks for reading!**

 **Oh and I wrote a Coffeeshop AU with these guys, if you'd like to check it out and maybe review...**


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